Thou, Oh LORD Are a Shield For Me

Yesterday was one of “those days”. 

The day before yesterday, during lunch, I was going through some of my old file folders and cleaning up.  I came across a folder of old choir songs.  I created a playlist for them, so I could listen to them while I’m playing with my square pegs. 

Yesterday, I was frustrated for a myriad of reasons.  Actually, frustration doesn't accurately describe how I was feeling.  I was far past frustrated.  I felt angry.  I cried out to God, even though I certainly did not feel like praying.  Most of you know that feeling.  You need help, but you’re angry and frustrated, and don’t want to pray.

How dumb is that? 

It’s like having a car that has a grinding sound from the engine, but instead of getting it to a mechanic, who can diagnose and fix it, we would rather just be angry and complain.

But I began praying (which can be interpreted as angrily griping about my situation).  Thank you, God, for being such a loving, patient Father to your spoiled little children.

As I was praying, I felt the still small voice tell me to listen to some music, and keep working on the square pegs.  So I did what any “good” Christian who desires to serve and honor his Father does.  I continued to complain.  I did not “feel like” listening to music.

After a moment, I gave up, and opened Media Player on my computer.  There were my playlists:

·         Choir

·         Bible (the entire Bible in audio format)

·         Country

·         Rock (exactly what it sounds like)

·         Uplifting (Contemporary Christian music)

If I was going to listen to anything, I was in the mood for rock.  But I found myself kicking off the Choir list.

And the music started.

Still angry…

Still frustrated…

Still didn’t want to listen to anything, much less Choir songs…

Thou, Oh Lord

Many are they increased that troubled me
Many are they that rise up against me
Many there be which say of my soul
There is no help for him in God

But Thou, oh Lord are a shield for me
My glory and the lifter of my head
Thou, oh Lord are a shield for me
My glory and the lifter of my head

I cried unto the Lord with my voice
And he heard me out of His holy hill
I laid me down and slept and awaked
For the Lord sustained, for he sustained me

Thou, oh Lord are a shield for me
My glory and the lifter of my head
Thou, oh Lord are shield for me
My glory and the lifter of my head

I soon found myself singing along. 

Music speaks to me in a way the spoken word never will.  And there were so many songs I loved singing in choir.  This was close to the top of the list.  As I silently sang my way through the song, I began to tear up as I hit the bridge.

I cried unto the Lord with my voice
And he heard me out of His holy hill
I laid me down and slept and awaked
For the Lord sustained, for he sustained me

And for some reason, I began to feel peace…

After the song ended, I played it again.  As the song neared the same spot, I felt it even stronger.  As I was crying to the LORD with my voice, He heard me.  And He was telling me that He would sustain me. 

I can’t explain the peace of God.  I don’t often feel it this strongly.  Deep inside, I know everything will be okay.  But in the midst of trials, I too often feel alone, and abandoned.  His word promises me I will never be that.  Ever.  This was one time He chose to sooth my anger with His gentle peace almost immediately.

If you have experienced that peace before, then you understand what I’m talking about.  If you haven’t, I could try all day to explain it, and you still wouldn't truly understand.

I don’t deserve for the God of all creation to take the time to worry about my little problems.  And please understand what I’m saying.  When He does, it has absolutely NOTHING to do with me being worth anything.  It is always ALL about His unfailing love.  His mercy.  His grace.  Why He chooses to bestow it on my during the times I’m most unlovable is something I will never understand this side of heaven. 

But I’ll gladly take it any time He chooses to give it.

No idea what I’m talking about? 

For God so loved the world….

You’ve all heard it…most of you can quote it.  

But do you believe it?  And does it make a difference in your life?

AT&T U-Verse

I hate Charter. 

Being a Christian, hate is a term I really shouldn't use.  But somehow, "I strongly dislike Charter" just didn't seem to capture the depth.

Two and a half years ago, we moved from Grapevine to North Richland Hills, TX.  In Grapevine, I had Verizon FIOS.  It was awesome.  Fiber directly to the house, incredible speed, and in the two years I had that service, I only had them out twice.  Neither time took more than ten or fifteen minutes to fix, and I was back up and running.

North Richland Hills isn't part of Verizon's coverage area.  Bummer.  In fact, when we moved in, the only company that offered anything other than dish was Charter.  I only thought I hated Charter.  Finally, one day I saw that AT&T offered U-Verse in our area.  I couldn't change over quick enough.  And, on top of everything else, they gave us $250 back.  It couldn't get any better than that, right?

Wrong.

AT&T came and got everything hooked up, and ten minutes after they left, I turned the TV to one of the music channels.  I went to the bedroom, and turned on the same channel, and they both froze.  Odd.  So I changed one to another channel, and they both came back on. 

"Why can't you watch the same channel in two rooms at the same time?" I wondered.

In less than a week, I had my answer.  It had nothing to do with what channel it was on.  I was all about the fact that U-Verse has an issue with the picture freezing. 

"The Cowboys a first down at the Eagle's forty with just over four minutes left."


"And the Eagles cap a successful drive with the extra point, and it's Eagles 21, the Cowboys 14 at the two minute warning."

"What happened?!?"

Getting involved in a Criminal Minds episode, and just at the most exciting part, the picture freezes.  It comes back on and they are in their plane, ending the show. 

I only thought I hated Charter.  Turns out, I was only aggravated at them.

I hate AT&T.

So I call their service department, and, first off, you have to go through one of those stupid auto attendants.

Recording:  "I see you are calling from 214-555-1212.  Is this the number on your U-Verse account."

Me:  "No."

Recording:  "Okay.  Please give me the phone number associated with your U-Verse account, or you can say, 'I don't have one'."

Me:  "I don't have one."

Recording:  "Okay.  Give me your U-Verse account number, your primary social security number, or the first thirty-seven prime numbers in descending order in Ancient Aramaic."

Me:  "I...what?"

Recording:  "I'm sorry, that was not a valid response.  Please wait while I locate a thirteen year old who is sitting in their living room playing X-box to assist you.  Don't worry that they are only thirteen.  They won't be able to help you anyway.  And thank you for being a valued AT&T customer."

Me:  "Great, now I need another cell phone."

So the first guy who came out replaced the connections in the attic, and the connections outside.

"That should fix the problem," he said as he was leaving. 

It worked flawlessly for almost an hour. 

So we lived with it for a couple more weeks before I called back to go through the same frustrating experience. 

The second guy told me he changed out all the connections outside, and in the attic, and my problem should be solved.

I don't think he appreciated the fine art of scoffing I was trying to entertain him with.

"The last guy who came out said he changed out all that stuff," I explained.

"Hmm."

This guy gave me his card, and said the problem should be fixed. 

"Call me if it happens again."

So ten minutes later, I dialed his number.  He came back out.  He said he needed to check the box in the neighbor's yard, and then down the street.

I never saw him again.  But it was okay for a week or so.

The third guy who came out replaced the modem.  It froze before he ever left.  So he also drilled another hole in my wall, and ran a new cable from the outside box to the modem inside. 

"Well, that will fix your issue," he assured me. 

He also was underimpressed with my scoffing ability, which was becoming quite polished by then.

It froze an hour after he was gone.  I called back, and got his voicemail.  (surprise).  I never heard back.

The next time I mustered the strength to call, I told them in no uncertain terms that the next time I called, I would be telling them their equipment was sitting in a box on my curb, and if they wanted it, they should come get it.  That was several months ago.

The problem seemed better in the last couple of months.  It only froze once every other day or so, and usually only for a minute or two.  Until this last week.

It was out all day, but started working when I got home and reset the modem.  Saturday, I reset the modem five times before calling them.  They set up a tech to come out between 4 and 9.  No one ever showed up, and no one ever called me to tell me they weren't going to show up.  They are supposed to be out today between 12 and 4.  I'm sure he will replace the connections in the attic, and outside, and tell us it should be fixed.

The next time I take a day off, I'm switching back to Charter.  Have I mentioned how much I love Charter?

Compared to AT&T, at least.