Not Quite What I Remember

So let me start with a confession.  

I am just a big kid.  

When I was a kid, my favorite cereal in the world was Franken Berry.  (For those unaware, it is a strawberry flavored cereal with marshmallows).  It was sad that it only came out during the Halloween season.  

For the past several years, I have seen it in stores during October, and often thought about buying some to revive old taste buds.  

This year, I finally broke.  I bought some to have for dessert at night.  And the other night, I excitedly got a bowl, and sat down to enjoy my special treat.  

It was not quite what I remember.  In fact, it was nothing like I remember.  Well, okay...it was still strawberry flavor.  

The marshmallows were okay.  But the cereal itself was something on the South end of disappointing.  I suppose it was better than dog food might be (although, when I was a kid, I kind of liked a product called "Doggy Donuts).  But I digress.  

I found myself just working to finish the bowl.  

How sad.  

Something I remember as being so wonderful just wasn't all that good.  Was it that I had lower standards back then?  Did they change the formula over the years?  Or have foods become so much sweeter through the years that what was sweet back then is like cardboard now?

I hear people talking about how awesome it was when they were in high school.  Bruce Springsteen sings about "Glory Days".  I think about what it would be like to go back, knowing what I know now. Yes, there are things I would change.  I'm over 50 now, but I wouldn't go back to my teenage years for anything.  

How much time is lost, longing for what was?  How can we enjoy life if we are too busy missing what we no longer have?  

When I was a kid, I didn't have a truck payment.  I lived at home, rent free.  I didn't have electric bills, or water bills.  I didn't have to go to work every single day.  I got to sleep in on the weekends until noon if I wanted to.  Friday and Saturday nights were spent at the arcade, and riding go karts, and whatever else we felt like doing.  

Now, I get up at 4 to 6 AM, and work ten to twelve hours a day.  Friday and Saturday nights are spent at home, looking through work for the next day.  Maybe taking the evening off, and watching TV.  I can't not work because I have a huge house payment, a truck payment, electric bills, water bills, insurance bills, cable bills, etc.  I have a wife, a mother-in-law, and three dogs living in the house.  There is seldom time to just sit and do nothing.

But in the last few years, God has shown me how to be thankful for things I always saw as negatives.

I'm thankful for a huge house payment because that means I have a nice home to come home to every evening.  Some people live in a cardboard box (or worse).

I'm thankful for a huge electric bill because it means I have heat and AC, and lights.  Some people freeze in winter, and swelter in summer because they don't have electricity.

I'm thankful to "have to" get up early every morning because it means I have a job to go to.  I have spent months looking through ads, trying to make ends meet on unemployment.  And I have the physical ability to go to work every day.  How many people are suffering from a disease, and would love nothing more than to be able to work?

I choose to be thankful for what I have now.  And I choose to not wish I could have what I thought was so good.

Wherever you are, and whatever is going on in your life now, choose to be thankful.  Thankful for what you have.  (If you are reading this, you have internet and access to a computer).  And you have eyes that can see, a brain that can comprehend, and the ability to read.  

It could be so much worse.

Now I just have to figure out what to do with an almost full box of Franken Berry.

Getting Older

Sitting around on Saturday night, we began to celebrate our birthdays. Mine was February 28th, my son, Chase, is March 19th, and my brother, Stuart, is March 20th. Dad was up from Sanderson to help celebrate, and we began to open gifts.

First was my brother's from dad. As he opened it, his smile slowly subsided to the awkward, "I want to look happy, but I'm not quite sure what this is" phase.

"Oh," he said. "This looks...was this on my list? I mean, it looks good...was it on my list?"

I walked over to where he was sitting, and saw it was a book on tape.

Dad made a comment about maybe he saw the wrong list. Stuart is in to a lot of different things, but I don't remember him ever asking for a book on tape. That's my thing. I like listening to books on tape while I'm driving back and forth to and from work. So I looked at the title, and it looked like something I might have put on my list, but I wasn't sure.

So when it was my turn, dad said it was the wrong card. The tape from my envelope had the same color green as my wrapping paper, (which was different from Stuart's). So I told dad it had been on that (my) present. He insisted it was on the wrong package, so I started to hand Stuart my present, knowing it was likely his anyway. Then dad showed me the tape, which was the same color as the paper, therefore proving it belonged on my present, which is what I had tried to convince him of just seconds earlier. So I opened my present, and saw it was a video game that Stuart had put on his list. We swapped presents, and got a light laugh.

Stuart made a comment that the book on tape (mine) looked good, so maybe he would borrow it on his long drive down to Terlingua next time he went.

Dawn suggested that since I already had one from Christmas, he could borrow it. I thought she meant my new one, and told her I was already done with the one from Christmas.

"I know," she said with a strange look on her face. "That's why I said he could borrow it."

We all started laughing out loud at how suddenly we had all turned into people incapable of rational thought, and much less capable of being able to communicate with each other.

Poor Chase. There he sat on the couch, watching the three of us Street men, likely realizing that this was what he has to look forward to. He and I have talked often enough (in a joking manner) about when it comes my time to be put in a home. Unfortunately, I'm afraid after this weekend, the next time might not be quite as lighthearted.

Later that night, because we needed to challenge our mental abilities further, we decided to play Chicken Foot. It is a domino game that I had heard of before. It's not that complicated, once you learn how to actually play correctly. Then again, that evening, I'm guessing Tic Tac Toe would have taxed our abilities.

In my defense, I had already lost all of my chips playing poker before pouring my heart and soul out over a grill to make sure everyone got to enjoy a wonderful meal of chicken and turkey dogs.

I didn't say it was a GOOD excuse.

I have learned, through experiences like this, to quit taking myself so seriously. (No one else does.)

Life is short. And too much time is spent watching the news, and realizing what a horrible world we live in sometimes. I'm convinced that every once in a while, we need to surround ourselves with others who will help us laugh.

In high school, my best friend was a guy named Dewayne. To all of us, he was Bubba. We were inseparable. And we laughed our way through just about every evening, and every weekend. For years, that got lost in me. I spent way too much time trying to prove to everyone that I was someone to be taken seriously.

I've learned better.

Thank you to my family, for being such a joy in my life.

And I'm sorry, Chase. I'm afraid this is what you have to look forward to. At least, I pray you will be blessed with family the way I have.